One thing I learned is about myself. I realized that I am a communicator. Yep – it took me three years and a lot of weirdo relationships to figure that out. I could have glanced down at the business card holder on my desk – it says “Director of Communication” underneath my name, or I could have glanced at my diploma “BS College of Communication” or looked at my PTA Volunteer role “Public Relations”. But oh well! It took me a lot of late night text messages, weirdo emails and a few left voicemails to figure out that I am a communicator.What does communication have to do with online dating you ask? Well in my humble scientific method skills I have hypothesized that those who post online do so because they lack the ability to communicate in person. (Pretty good theory right?!?) I am not saying that everyone who online dates can’t speak, more like they tend to be the type of person who is happy to check in and out of a relationship with a quick email. As if a quick “Hey” via a text or email qualifies as a solid communication and shall progress your relationship status quite nicely.
I am here to declare that a ‘How r u?’ text message does not count as communicating while trying to get to know someone. Yes, it is a good start, but if you send that message you better be prepared for my answer, then you should wittily respond something back that shows you actually READ the text and that you have something to offer in return.
Over and over again I get the “Hey, watz up” text… Really? Then maybe a day or two later a “how u been?” Or, my favorite… “I’m bzy, call u ltr” Guys – here is a clue. IF you actually want to see a girl, pick up the phone and call her. Say hello, ask a question, listen for a response, pretend you heard her and say something nice back. It is very easy to start communicating and it may lead to something more, like a date!
I am not man bashing here, I am sure there are plenty of girls out there who are just as comfortable with the random text messages and one line emails that progress a relationship along. I am simply not one of them.
So, from now on, no more online dating sites for me. No more replies to 3 word text messages. No more sending emails listing in paragraph form my thoughts on life only to get a response like “sounds good”. I am declaring loud and clear that I am a communicator and that I need communication in return.
As far as finding a date? I’m not really sure how that will happen, but I’m thinking I should start looking into people who have “Communication” in their job title…..